Before I say this please let me make it clear that I don’t have any plans to kill myself.
Does anyone else feel more fatigued/defeated than panicked in regards to this pandemic?
I had virtually no will to live before things got “bad” a week or two ago. I never had an actual plant to commit suicide but I basically moved through the motions of being alive without much joy or motivation for practically anything.
Now, with the reality setting in that life will be much, much worse for at least the next few years, and probably the next decade, my will to live has dropped even lower than I even thought possible. A lot of people around me are saying to “stay strong” and “we’ll make it through” but I don’t even want to make it through.
Suffering through an unprecedented global catastrophe, for what? Just to return to the “normal” that I had no interest in being a part of in the first place? Why would anyone even care to fight for that?
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